Val Blues

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine’s Day

Ok, I know how that sounds but just hear me out. In fact, who says I don’t have the right to make my Val blue sef. At least all we use to hear about was Red Carpet before someone decided to break the norm and now we have ‘Carpets’ of all kinds of colours. Maybe I can start a Blue Val trend and if I do my job well on twitter, who knows… And besides, Red Val looks a lot like Christmas all over again so…

I’ve just been rambling through the last paragraph as Val Blues really has nothing to do with colours (I don’t know why I just always miss the point early on.) The truth is that Val’s Day is regularly over-hyped, like every other ‘special day’ in the year. And with this over-hype comes a lot of negatives. Thank God the subsidy issue came into our lives! An irony? Well, guys are now thinking twice about the day so much as joking about the cancellation of the day (bbm things) and asking ladies to alternatively spend the day with ‘loved ones’, as if we’re the last on the list. 😐

Anyway, Val Blues is about seeing this day the right way; like every other day. The thing is, with ‘special days’ (such as Christmas) we condition ourselves to do certain things in a certain way. Only thing is, there’s an extra problem with Val’s Day. This is like the certified day of LOVE (often conveniently misinterpreted as SEX) and frequently creates an avenue for the fulfillment of LUSTful desires. Now, Val’s Day can be disputed as a relevant day in itself because I personally have issues with setting aside a special day for love. It is easily misconstrued, as our definition of love itself is way below the original meaning.

This brings me to a point argued on Twitter recently. Statement is: “Love is Never Enough.” As much as I’d love to agree with this statement, I think we often miss the point of love itself. Take a relationship for example, a guy meets a girl, falls in love with her and she falls her own back. Simple. Love is shared! But then, they start having issues when she acts up on irrelevant things or he behaves in certain ways or she says some nasty things in anger or he ignores her for a while. There are a thousand and one things that could, and do, go wrong in such relationships. In this case, it’s easy to say “Love isn’t enough”, but let’s look at it critically, what else is there?

Breakdown: There’s Understanding, a little bit of which goes a long way in any relationship. There’s Respect, something which a whole lot of people believe would easily keep a relationship steady. There’s Patience, which a lot of ladies seem to lack (some guys are also not left out though.) There’s Communication, which is an important component of an effective relationship. There’s Trust, the bedrock of a solid relationship. All these are basic and mainly borne out of individual Character. Almost everything else is secondary; Looks, Financial Status, Career, etc. External factors, such as family, friends and environment, also play significant roles in a relationship, but when it comes down to the two of them, the above-listed are the crux.

Now I ask, why wouldn’t love be enough? And I answer, because we all see love as those butterflies or just the way we feel. So you both love each other but realise that you fight too much, or your ways just don’t match or there’s one thing or another, so you just break up because “love isn’t enough!” I put it to you that what you shared initially wasn’t love. Let me make it clear that love, of any kind, in a one-way direction (only one person falling) will most likely not work, and if managed will often lead to hurt. But in a case where you both claim to share love, it should be ENOUGH! Why? It’s simple. Because love, TRUE LOVE, includes all the above. You have to love him to trust him unconditionally. You have to love her to be patient with her when she acts up. You have to love him to understand his actions and explanations. You have to love her to always want to talk to and confide in her. You have to love him to respect him everywhere, even when you’re alone. You have to love her to forgive her offenses against you. True love has all these things by nature and, therefore, is enough in itself. It carries its own power to solidify and keep any relationship. That’s LOVE!

So, next time you think love isn’t enough, ask yourself if what you have is actually LOVE. As the often cherished Val’s Day approaches, I’d encourage us all to have a rethink. Take the day to re-examine the relationship. If there’s true love shared, you don’t need to ask him before he takes you out or gets you a gift, if he can afford it. He should do it because he knows you’re worth it. And as a lady, your priority shouldn’t be where he’d take you or what he’d get you. If it is, then your relationship isn’t true. You should actually just want to spend meaningful time with him. As a guy, it isn’t a certified day to get into her pants. That should even be the last thing on your mind. If it’s true love, you’re spending a long time together, so why rush? You should just want to give her some special treatment for the day.

As much as I’d not want a day like that to be recognized, it already is so we might as well make meaningful use of it. In my opinion, everything we do on that day should be replicated on a consistent basis throughout the year. Everyday should be special. If you can afford it, get her a new gift everyday. Spend as much time as you can together on a daily basis. Express your love in special ways every single day. Make your relationship lively, think in the long term, keep him/her in your heart always and you’ll find that LOVE is really ALL YOU NEED! Not just on Val’s Day, but every single day you have with the one you truly love.

Let the season of love come, and let it never leave again. St. Valentine’s Day is here. Let’s HAVE love and not just MAKE love! You can only share what you have, and I tell you, love is worth sharing. Treat her special. Treat him like a king. You all are royalty!

To all who do share True Love in this season, I say “HAPPY VAL’S DAY!!!” Enjoy!

I’m Loving Up!!!

What True Love is

What True Love is

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Fairly Legal

I never planned on this post until two days ago after going through a few blog posts. I know the title might sound a lil girlie (for those who follow the series) but there’s a reason. It actually has to do with one word that is well associated with the series: Mediation!

First, I’d like to say here that I’m not a Twitter freak like most of you, so any subbing or counter-subbing on there won’t get my attn: and would be a serious waste of time (as if peeps will even get to read this sef). Just tryna advise those who might get a head-rush and try to make a(n unwanted) superstar (a.k.a. celeb) of me on twitville (via subbing and the likes), to spend their energy on more productive things (whatever they might be).

That said, let us move to the main gist:

Ok, I was on my own jeje, trying to get my brand new (cha-cha) blog up and running, perfecting my first post (as if there’s anything to perfect there sef) when I decided to go through my blogville role model’s blog (if u don’t know who he is by now, no need carrying any last. U can like to go to my first post to find out. *cheap promo*), just to see what he’s been up to. That was when I saw his (then new) post ‘In The News’ which is kinda like his news broadcast for the week. Reading through (and skipping parts, *sorry man, I did*), my gbeborun self got interested in some links he posted about some Twitter ‘rants’ in blogville, so I decided to check ’em out (just for fun o!)

Well, I saved the links on my Opera to be attended to when I had time (which wasn’t until two days ago). It was that NonsenseBoi (e sabi gbeborun, ehn!) who came to ask me if I’d read the first blog. This increased my interest a lil more and I decided to finally delve into the whole gist. After reading the first one, then the reply and then the reply to the ‘replies’ (I only read one), I just thought I should share my opinion, and I’d just address the parties I can.

If you don’t already know (which means you’re very much not in tune with Twitter *worse than me*), the whole thing started (I think) with someone who attempted to reenact ‘Ehn ehn pt. 3’ and diss ‘The Celebs of Twitville’ which, in effect, started a chain reaction (never knew how far it went, though.)

*Sidetalk: Before we go any further, a lil education for the Twitterless souls. You can count yourselves lucky (or unlucky depending on how you feel about it) because as interesting as twitter seems to be, it’s turned to a place where u can get de-repped sharp-sharp without any prior warning. The in-things now are twitfights, subbing and voltroning (you don’t want to know what they mean). So if you’re not there yet, you might want to think twice (and try to read blogposts on those things first!) But for those whose lives already revolve around it, well…what can I say? Enjoy! Seriously though, twitter is very fun if you can get to blend in and go with the flow sha (which I haven’t).*

My opinion on the whole issue:

*Another Sidetalk: As common as Twitfights and subbing are, I never observed any, talkless of being in one (e pain me say I miss Kev’s own. I carried serious last as dem dey diss my guy. Ah!), but I have a good idea what they involve. And now that twitfolks are bringing the fights to blogs, it’s getting clearer.*

Simple truth is; every single person has an opinion, and with that opinion comes the right to express it! Another truth is, opinions don’t represent the vast majority until they support it. Based on this, both TheGothPrince and ThelmaTweets expressed theirs as much as they could and got (record-breaking?) responses to both posts.

Like I said before, I’m not a diehard Twitter fan so I don’t really know these guys there (I think I follow ThelmaTweets, though. And I’m yet to understand why people generally beg other people for ffbks!) but from what I read in their posts, both were angered by the other’s points when, in reality, they shouldn’t be.

First thing is, the guy asked for ‘it’ when he decided to go all out and ‘name names’ and I expected he’d take all that would be thrown at him with a pinch of salt but when I read the reply and he referred to her as ‘defending her lord and saviour’, it came across as one who’s just lashing out at everyone that countered his opinion. I mean, it’s really uncalled for. It’s a simple case, you think the guys are not worth what they’re hyped up to be, she thinks it’s an unfair assessment, Shikena!

As for ThelmaTweets, you might know this SlimFingaz or is it TweetOracle guy and think he’s cool but when someone else thinks he’s not, all you need to ask is ‘Why?’ The guy said some things in the backup post that, if true, would mean he seem to make sense with the first one. Sometimes, a nice reminder from nowhere is needed to check those who think they are power brokers in certain areas of life (in this case, Twitville.) But if voltroning was just what you did then I can’t say much.

Back to the guy, this is the world we find ourselves in where people turn simple things (like Twitter just for expression of thoughts) to complexities (like getting ‘famous’, dissing, famzing, voltroning, subbing and the likes). We need to get over ourselves. People will get famous, whether online or off, and they will deal with it in different ways. The way it is in real life is exactly how it is online. Some will remain humble while others will throw their weight around, it is what it is. So if you really wanted to just check them, you could have been more subtle. The way it is, you could be said to also be looking for cheap fame (forget the fact that you didn’t ask for the ffs, you knew they’d come), so…

In any case, you guys expressed your opinions and it’s your prerogatives to do so but try to provide more objective analysis next time. No need for the attacks on personalities. Do not claim to be a crusader for ‘positweev’ change and go about it the ‘Rugged’ way then expect us to believe you’re not just tryna show off!

So, as a mediator, I expect you guys to understand and respect each other’s POV. Btw, you both share a common stance in that Twitter gives us the freedom to block, follow, unfollow and mute anyone, so it seems we don’t have much complaints, do we? Let’s just get on with our lives and go back to the usual creative stuff blogville is known for.
*Here’s where they kiss and make up (if they haven’t already done so.)*

Finally, Terdoh, just having fun through the whole thing. :D. I guess I still have to go through your other posts. You’re well recommended.

P.S.: In case you’re wondering where my loyalty lies on twitter (why would you wonder about that in the first place? I’m already getting famous in my head o!), I’ll be voltroning for my homeboy, so don’t tasi the boy at all o!

I’m _eaving#WithAnL!!!

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