The State

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Since most of us went through the robotic Nigerian educational system, I expect everyone to understand when I talk about the different states of matter. If you’ve forgotten, let me remind you. Matter has three main states viz (I remember how they explain those things back then); SOLID, LIQUID and GAS. Ok, now I don’t think I need to explain further because we all know what those are. I expect us to know that Solid is a good example of ‘United we Stand’ while Liquid is quite loose which allows flow unless when contained. Gas is another matter entirely. It is chaos ‘personified’. It can also be contained, but that has to be under pressure with the consequence of probable combustibility.

We have had quite an eventful first two months of the year. I’m not sure so much has happened in the first month of any year in a long while. Maybe the 2002 bomb blast in Lagos and probably some other events that have affected some people more than others but never generally as a nation. Roll in January 2012 and we’ve already had a mighty jump in fuel pump price, an unprecedented shutdown of the nation’s economy for five solid days, a rally and nationwide protest like no other, a certainly predictable ‘stab-in-the-back’ by labour, and an ambush of protesters by the government all garnished by the attacks of the dreaded Boko Haram. Wow! It’s really been a crazy month and for those of us born in it, it seems to have some sorta special effect. February faired a little better but with its preceding month having so much action, it was condemned to carry on the spirit. As it so happens, more BH action and FG’s seeming reactions along with the major sideshow called the Subsidy Probe with a cameo appearance by ND militants shaped February. The show actually got interesting with the disappearance and re-arrest of a major suspect, the change of guard at the helm of security affairs and the subsequent dismissal of one of the main acts. We also had the death sentence pronouncement on a suspected killer of ‘international’ acclaim and his sidekick with the resultant public (and BH) reaction AND we were reminded again how loose our constitution is after five state governors were given a chance to extend the years of ‘plausible’ service to their various states with the result that no two ‘learned colleagues’ could fully interprete the judgments straightforward.

Through all these, a lot have come into the open and it remains to be seen where exactly we are going as a nation, or even if there is a nation in the first place. The positive I’ve taken out of these events is that now we know there is an avenue for us to step out of our ‘complaints room’ and actually let our grievances be known to the rest of the world. The role the social media played at that period was also phenomenal. It is a very powerful weapon indeed! Lots of negatives came out of all the show, though. It is now looking more and more like without some form of organized private violent attacks on these politicians, there’d never be a lasting solution to our problems. That looks more like a starting point of cleansing our political system and I tell you, it is a very unattractive but increasingly inevitable option. What with all forms of discussions (probe panels and conferences) heading nowhere in resolving our issues. And we keep hearing that dialogue is the way forward. We all know what happened when we allowed our labour leaders to dialogue with the FG. Now tell me, what options do we have left, or right as the case may be?

Well, taking all these into the context of the states of matter earlier discussed, I’m fixing the state of our nation at ‘Liquid’. Yes, we sure as hell aren’t ‘Solid’! Never have been! It is becoming more apparent that we seemed to have formed a nation on a false foundation. It’s the reason why there will always be a call for SNC anytime major issues develop. We are in a ‘liquid’ state and it is fast moving away from something like water, towards the more volatile types such as methylated spirit. For one thing, a ‘solid’ nation is what we all hope to build and we definitely should be working towards that, but as things stand, we are quickly moving to a gaseous state and that is the point where anarchy reigns supreme. It may not look like too much of a possibility right now but who would have thought, just five years back, that a Nigerian would ever want to blow himself up for any particular cause. Or even that blowing bombs will become as commonplace as throwing bangers and knockouts. I tell you, Nigeria is fast becoming a ‘gas’ and if we don’t try to rein in the current trend, we will definitely find ourselves as particles in that state faster than we know.

Now that we are still in the ‘liquid’ state, I think it’s best we just try to contain the flow and ensure a calm. Outside influences only create disturbances which are most times unnecessary. The problem is, if our leaders and the political class continue in their present impunity, BH will be the least of Nigeria’s problems and a gaseous nation will be like the only solution. Things have to be done right and someone, or probably a group of people, will have to take it upon themselves to ensure these senseless high-class thieves and thugs come to their senses fast before they no longer have a country to pillage anymore. We might need to freeze a lot of things (assets, accounts, authorities, etc) to start the process towards solidifying the nation. We just have to take some drastic measures to ensure the nation gets to a ‘solid’ state where our unity in our diversity will be our strength.

As for us particles in whatever state the nation is, we can make a conscious effort towards ensuring we make something solid out of our present volatile state by putting our hands, and heads, together and ‘re-occupying’ at every opportunity we can get to set things right starting from the ward and council levels. We own this country. We make this country. Without us the nation won’t even have a state to be in, therefore, we can’t afford to fold our hands and let a misguided few lead us into a state we don’t want. This is a battlecry to call us to fight now when the battle is easier and voluntary. We can’t relapse now. We know what we had during that five days. Now we know we can do more! We can actually get them to listen and do things exactly how we want them done. Let’s face up to our responsibilities and decide our own fate. I suggest forming enlightenment groups in communities and creating monthly action plans which must be followed through. Let’s start our own Affirmative Action! We can do this! Let’s Go Nigerians!!!

Getting Ready!!! I’m Out!!!

Val Blues

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine’s Day

Ok, I know how that sounds but just hear me out. In fact, who says I don’t have the right to make my Val blue sef. At least all we use to hear about was Red Carpet before someone decided to break the norm and now we have ‘Carpets’ of all kinds of colours. Maybe I can start a Blue Val trend and if I do my job well on twitter, who knows… And besides, Red Val looks a lot like Christmas all over again so…

I’ve just been rambling through the last paragraph as Val Blues really has nothing to do with colours (I don’t know why I just always miss the point early on.) The truth is that Val’s Day is regularly over-hyped, like every other ‘special day’ in the year. And with this over-hype comes a lot of negatives. Thank God the subsidy issue came into our lives! An irony? Well, guys are now thinking twice about the day so much as joking about the cancellation of the day (bbm things) and asking ladies to alternatively spend the day with ‘loved ones’, as if we’re the last on the list. 😐

Anyway, Val Blues is about seeing this day the right way; like every other day. The thing is, with ‘special days’ (such as Christmas) we condition ourselves to do certain things in a certain way. Only thing is, there’s an extra problem with Val’s Day. This is like the certified day of LOVE (often conveniently misinterpreted as SEX) and frequently creates an avenue for the fulfillment of LUSTful desires. Now, Val’s Day can be disputed as a relevant day in itself because I personally have issues with setting aside a special day for love. It is easily misconstrued, as our definition of love itself is way below the original meaning.

This brings me to a point argued on Twitter recently. Statement is: “Love is Never Enough.” As much as I’d love to agree with this statement, I think we often miss the point of love itself. Take a relationship for example, a guy meets a girl, falls in love with her and she falls her own back. Simple. Love is shared! But then, they start having issues when she acts up on irrelevant things or he behaves in certain ways or she says some nasty things in anger or he ignores her for a while. There are a thousand and one things that could, and do, go wrong in such relationships. In this case, it’s easy to say “Love isn’t enough”, but let’s look at it critically, what else is there?

Breakdown: There’s Understanding, a little bit of which goes a long way in any relationship. There’s Respect, something which a whole lot of people believe would easily keep a relationship steady. There’s Patience, which a lot of ladies seem to lack (some guys are also not left out though.) There’s Communication, which is an important component of an effective relationship. There’s Trust, the bedrock of a solid relationship. All these are basic and mainly borne out of individual Character. Almost everything else is secondary; Looks, Financial Status, Career, etc. External factors, such as family, friends and environment, also play significant roles in a relationship, but when it comes down to the two of them, the above-listed are the crux.

Now I ask, why wouldn’t love be enough? And I answer, because we all see love as those butterflies or just the way we feel. So you both love each other but realise that you fight too much, or your ways just don’t match or there’s one thing or another, so you just break up because “love isn’t enough!” I put it to you that what you shared initially wasn’t love. Let me make it clear that love, of any kind, in a one-way direction (only one person falling) will most likely not work, and if managed will often lead to hurt. But in a case where you both claim to share love, it should be ENOUGH! Why? It’s simple. Because love, TRUE LOVE, includes all the above. You have to love him to trust him unconditionally. You have to love her to be patient with her when she acts up. You have to love him to understand his actions and explanations. You have to love her to always want to talk to and confide in her. You have to love him to respect him everywhere, even when you’re alone. You have to love her to forgive her offenses against you. True love has all these things by nature and, therefore, is enough in itself. It carries its own power to solidify and keep any relationship. That’s LOVE!

So, next time you think love isn’t enough, ask yourself if what you have is actually LOVE. As the often cherished Val’s Day approaches, I’d encourage us all to have a rethink. Take the day to re-examine the relationship. If there’s true love shared, you don’t need to ask him before he takes you out or gets you a gift, if he can afford it. He should do it because he knows you’re worth it. And as a lady, your priority shouldn’t be where he’d take you or what he’d get you. If it is, then your relationship isn’t true. You should actually just want to spend meaningful time with him. As a guy, it isn’t a certified day to get into her pants. That should even be the last thing on your mind. If it’s true love, you’re spending a long time together, so why rush? You should just want to give her some special treatment for the day.

As much as I’d not want a day like that to be recognized, it already is so we might as well make meaningful use of it. In my opinion, everything we do on that day should be replicated on a consistent basis throughout the year. Everyday should be special. If you can afford it, get her a new gift everyday. Spend as much time as you can together on a daily basis. Express your love in special ways every single day. Make your relationship lively, think in the long term, keep him/her in your heart always and you’ll find that LOVE is really ALL YOU NEED! Not just on Val’s Day, but every single day you have with the one you truly love.

Let the season of love come, and let it never leave again. St. Valentine’s Day is here. Let’s HAVE love and not just MAKE love! You can only share what you have, and I tell you, love is worth sharing. Treat her special. Treat him like a king. You all are royalty!

To all who do share True Love in this season, I say “HAPPY VAL’S DAY!!!” Enjoy!

I’m Loving Up!!!

What True Love is

What True Love is